consuming murmurs

i.
i miss you.
phantom touches leave me shivering,
my spine tingling
from your ephemeral presence.
it's suffocating me,
leaving me gasping for reprieve
from these ghostly memories.
these cold, pale fingers try to grasp you,
bring whatever's left closer.
closer to my heart, my soul,
my twisted dreams--
they leave me shaking.

ii.
i need you.
i'm thrashing in my sleep again.
it's hazy and foggy and (strangely enough)
i think i see the persisting insanity of my mind.
the ones who can argue
are only more than happy to push the process along.
[i thought i was already there?]
i'm still at this dead end, where
you left me waiting, watching
the barren wasteland of yesterday, today, tomorrow.
dandelions twist in the wind,
their pollen sending whispers away.
they're asking for you.
(again?) i'm asking--
for you?
i wonder if you still remember me.

iii.
i love you.
i can't remember
what you liked to do.
your words caressed me,
left me wanting.
your hands were rough
with calluses, with fingers that knew
how to play a guitar and make any girl swoon.
i liked your eyes best.
your rugged, chiseled face--
yes, you made me swoon too.
i think it was your smirk.

iv.
i want you.
you know the contours of my body.
you know the places that make me sigh,
gasp, giggle. that was so long ago...
the weeks pass by so fast.
life's so strange, but i know we can deal.
all i need is you and your voice
and we can sing together under the moon.
it glows because of you and i know i must be glowing too.
getting tired and sleepy, i can only stare.
the sky's so spacious; the stars are falling.
let's make a wish or two,
but there do not seem to be enough
for the two of us.

v.
leave me alone.
i'm sick of you.
your beautiful blue eyes, your sun-kissed hair, your soft, pale lips--
stop haunting me!
the tears won't stop
and these never-ending thoughts won't stop spinning.
they leave me dizzy
and I can't recall the reason why.